Identity and Purpose

Life is rooted in identity, purpose, faith, and family/friends.

True faith in the Truth is anti-religion.

“I always feel out of place like I don’t belong” ~ me, on 9/8/2010, right after starting professional work for the first time in Deloitte Consulting

"These days I feel no direction and purpose for life. I also feel scared and concerned about..." ~ me, on 1/9/2013

I’m going to reveal some of my most epic failures because I know it will help at least one man out there. Maybe a young man is reading right now.

I wish my 24-year-old self had access to this content and read it word for word.

I don’t care if this embarrasses me. Human validation no longer matters to me. I always cared less about human approval than most people. However, since fully awakening in July 2025, it's now definitively something that has no power over me.

Most people usually want to look good on the outside or appear like they have and always had it all under control. 

The reality is that we're all flawed individuals.

It's just a matter of who's willing to admit it.

When you admit it, you change.

You peel layer after layer of unnatural additions away from your soul.

You then tap into the absolute raw power of your true being, that child you once were, careless and free, just being.

You can physically delay aging to a certain degree.

Physical aging is caused by and accelerated by anything unnatural to your original design found in Genesis. It’s not that hard.

I noticed that during any period of my life, whether it was months or years, whenever my spirit was far from God, I physically looked older in photos. So as of August 2025, I look, feel, and move like I'm much younger than before, especially when compared to when I was in a toxic marriage.

False Christians

Since awakening in July 2025 and receiving messages and visions that certainly were not from this world, I saw something profound.

There e many who claim the name of Christ and proclaim they are Christians.

However, they did not welcome LGBTQ or any marginalized people. They did not love them.

They thought they were superior to other humans. They overestimated their own worth. Worthy is the Lamb. Worthy is God on High. But humans? No human is worthy without the covering of Jesus Christ. These self-proclaimed Christians never cared to learn this basic fundamental lesson God explained time and time again.

They did not give money, energy, or time to those poor in material or poor in spirit.

They lived just like everybody else in the world.
They just kept on focusing on themselves.

Kept on taking more than they give.

Kept on consuming more than they produce. 

Kept focusing on amassing the wealth of the world instead of serving and growing.

They continued sinning, living a life of sin, because they did not want to pursue sanctification.

They made excuses, saying that it's not possible to be perfect anyway, so why bother trying? 

They willingly ignore the Bible, God's Word, the Living Word, who is God in written form.

They invented a god using their mind, while using the true God for their own purposes.

They dared to define God using human minds—a blasphemy that almost all humans do today. But they did it worse because they went to church and claimed to be Christians, bearing His Name, yet they still did this.

There's a difference between ignorance and purposeful ignorance.

I don’t know where the believers who remained purposely ignorant and rebellious as they passed from this world are today.

I don’t know where the believers who are purposely ignorant and not following God today will go after they pass from this world, especially if they don’t repent and turn their lives around.

I don’t know but I do know that if we’re alive in the physical world, then there’s still time for all of us.

God doesn’t seek perfection, but He seeks obedience.

He knows our hearts and minds.

He’s looking at intentions and actions because He knows lips often lie.

God never asked for believers.

He asked for followers.

Followers are a subset of believers and have Eternal Life, and the Holy Spirit lives in them.

Satan, fallen angels, demons, and all of the dark spirits of the world all believe in God.

They knew God from the beginning of their existence.

They hear the name of “Jesus” and tremble.

They tremble because they saw it all.

They saw and remembered their downfall and the pending judgment of their eternal suffering.

They saw God come to earth as Jesus and win over sin, and therefore death, and therefore Satan, and his entire kingdom.

Yet, they do not follow God.
They continue rebelling.

The biggest difference between human believers and Satanic beings is just one action:

• Pursuing sanctification by following Jesus, who is and always was God.

Believers who pursue sanctification are followers and therefore have salvation.

We specifically need to follow Jesus because that's the perfect example that God gave us, Himself, in human form.

Jesus sees every single human alive today as the SAME.

He is NOT divisive without righteousness and love. 

He is Righteousness.

He is Love.

God sees ALL humans as imperfect.

As long as we have one single deviation from our original design, we are already imperfect. 

We are already corrupted by Adam and Eve's original sin.

“You can’t pick and choose in these things, specializing in keeping one or two things in God’s law and ignoring others. The same God who said, ‘Don’t commit adultery,’ also said, ‘Don’t murder.’ If you don’t keep even one of these laws, it’s as if you broke them all.” ~ James 2:10

“All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” ~ Romans 3:23

ALL sins are deviations from our original design. They are what separates us from God and eternal life.

The Bible is so clear about this that if any self-proclaimed Christian acts or even thinks unlovingly, they should look deep into themselves, search their heart, pray, and ask God to search their heart and surface the sin that's causing them to be judgmental and divisive without love.

Any Christian who does not welcome people of ALL races, faiths, sexual orientations, gender identifications, backgrounds, or ANY characteristic and traits needs to first look within themselves, repent, and take action to change themselves.

"It’s easy to see a smudge on your neighbor’s face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own. Do you have the nerve to say, ‘Let me wash your face for you,’ when your own face is distorted by contempt? It’s this whole traveling road-show mentality all over again, playing a holier-than-thou part instead of just living your part. Wipe that ugly sneer off your own face, and you might be fit to offer a washcloth to your neighbor." ~ Matthew 7:3–5

No human has the authority to judge for salvation. 
Only God can judge us and determine our final destinations.

We are called to rebuke, to correct, to teach, to judge behaviors and sins, but not people.

We are called to be holy, a different people, righteously divisive, rooted in love and truth, with a constant desire for all people to obtain salvation, eternal life, and be delivered by Jesus, God.

We can never say anything about a specific person's salvation. That's only known to God. If any self-proclaimed Christian judges as if they were God, then I fear for their salvation.

False Christians offend me because they have no right to bear His Holy Name.

False Christians are judged far more severely than non-believers because they chose not to follow despite hearing the Good News and believing it.

False Christians are condemned far more deeply than non-believers because their lives caused non-believers to suffer more. They led people astray when they did not stand out. They conformed to the world and often behaved far worse than non-believers. It’s much harder for someone to believe in God when they have met people who claim to know God but live a life of obvious sin and do not overflow with the Fruit of the Spirit: 

“But what happens when we live God’s way? He brings gifts into our lives, much the same way that fruit appears in an orchard—things like affection for others, exuberance about life, serenity. We develop a willingness to stick with things, a sense of compassion in the heart, and a conviction that a basic holiness permeates things and people. We find ourselves involved in loyal commitments, not needing to force our way in life, able to marshal and direct our energies wisely. Legalism is helpless in bringing this about; it only gets in the way.” ~ Galatians 5:22–23

On Sin

All that said, there are different degrees of sin.

“The one who betrayed me to you has committed an even greater sin” ~ John 19:11

And there is one single unpardonable sin.

"Listen to this carefully. I’m warning you. There’s nothing done or said that can’t be forgiven. But if you persist in your slanders against God’s Holy Spirit, you are repudiating the very One who forgives, sawing off the branch on which you’re sitting, severing by your own perversity all connection with the One who forgives.” ~ Mark 3:28–30

The above isn’t a casual slip of words.

It’s a hardened, persistent rejection of the Spirit’s testimony about Jesus.

In other words: continually refusing God’s Spirit, so that forgiveness can’t reach you—not because God’s mercy is too weak, but because you’ve cut yourself off from it.

This unpardonable sin must be taken seriously with urgency.

Almost all humans think that they simply will just "not exist" after death on earth. This is one of the Great Lies Satan invented, and it's extremely effective in keeping humans away from eternal life.

Satan is a master of deception and his craft is lying. He loves it when humans forget. The more we forget the better.

Hell is not a physical place.

Hell is where God is nowhere to be found.

Imagine the worst of life on earth that you have seen, heard, or experienced.

It's far worse than that because God's still here on earth, working.

Some of my biggest failures prior to awakening

Now onto the failures, shared here because they might help at least one man out there somehow.

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Right now it’s Saturday, 8/2/2025, morning. It's the Civic Holiday weekend in Canada.

After the 4th watch, I took a nap. Somewhere between consciousness and sleep, I was attacked by a small demon. I know why. Small chip in armor. I didn't act on the sin physically, but did in my mind.

This time, I was not attacked by a greater demon, likely due to not having a large hole that allows it to come. Greater demons are not fun to deal with when they attack.

I woke up and immediately knew I had to read my diary from my early 20s for some reason.

I saw myself on the day I lost my virginity, which was this exact weekend, on Civic Holiday weekend in 2012. 8/6/2012. 13 years ago. Did not realize it was the same weekend. Maybe this isn't significant, but it seemed like an odd coincidence.

Last night, before bed, I was asking God if the mission He gave me is real or not because my own brother didn't even believe it. My faith began wavering.

God said:

"But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance." ~ 2 Peter 3:8–9

I immediately understood it as: God sent the mother, among others, to slow things down ahead so workers like me can keep going and do our best to wake people up and get lost souls back Home.

After I got up from the nap and read my diary from 2010 - 2013, I knew I had to write this page and put it up immediately. If you know me, I do not procrastinate. I wait for signals, then as soon as I see what must be done, I move with conviction.

I wrote this page now because four things happened together all at once. If it's just one or two of these, it's not enough to convince me to reveal such personal details publicly. I don't do these things unless I know with assurance that it's instruction from God.

== 1) Last night, God told me via that verse above, 2 Peter 3:8–9, to keep going. He wants people saved. ==

I was about to sleep without doing my daily devotional, but then I decided to at least open the Bible app and just look at the verse only.

He says to stop complaining. 

He reminded me via His Spirit, "My Son Jesus' earthly brothers didn't believe him at first, too." 

Ok, I'll try.

== 2) Last night, one and only one person requested to connect with me on LinkedIn. I knew he was a brother from my spiritual eyes. ==

The connection request came right when I was reading the Bible verse above.

I asked him directly as my first message if he’s a follower of Christ because I already sensed from looking at his eyes and name on LinkedIn (recent gift from God), and just wanted to level set.

He confirms yes, he's Christian.

He says he was about to sleep, but then he felt compelled to connect.

He seems young, and he asked me something about how I combine faith and professional ambitions.

== 3) This morning, I read my diary from 2010-2013, and it's full of stupidity and pain that the entire world is still repeating right now, especially the younger generation. ==

It all stems from not having an identity and purpose in God, the one who created us. 

I was agnostic during this period and abandoned my faith completely.

I chased sex, money, worldly success, titles, and made plans for myself relying on human effort, thinking there is nothing greater than human effort. Implying that we are gods of our own lives.

I married my son's mom because she's physically attractive, despite hundreds of warnings and signals that it was a bad idea. We just didn’t fit. Epic fail on my part. I paid the price through the marriage falling apart. Our divorce process lasted from January 2019 to late 2021. I take responsibility. Regardless of everything she did that I don’t approve of, it was I who chased her first. She never initiated the relationship.

In my diary, I saw that I was dating my son’s mom on and off. So much fighting. So much suffering for both people.

Massive pain. Tears. Agony.

Scars upon scars caused the gradual closing and changing of my heart and maybe her heart too.

It’s all recorded.

I was confused about dating, life, and career.

I was enjoying sex with extreme physical satisfaction that fulfilled my lust, but I had no idea that my soul was dying.

We fought constantly.

But for some reason, the more we fought, the more frequent we had sex, and the sex was purely to enjoy the physical pleasure.

Is this what people call "passion"? I don't know. But this should NOT be pursued.

All those reality TV shows about "passion" will lead people astray. You cannot tame the Greater Demon of Lust.

It’s clear to me now that that kind of sex is not real intimacy. But back then, I remember it was just what I knew to be sex. I thought it was perfectly normal and good.

I was using my performance in bed with women to fulfill a gap in my soul, my deep insecurities. I believed that if I made women feel good, then they wouldn't leave me.

I was Godless, a degenerate, so of course I wanted to cling to something.

I recorded in my diary that I was comparing myself to others, feeling angry, jealous, stressed, and unhappy. I had a lot of career and money stress.

I was making so many human plans yet feeling anxious.

It wasn’t clear to me back then, but it’s obvious now that often human plans lead to anxiety and worries because they assume human effort is all there is to realize the plans.

But human effort cannot be fully trusted. Human effort usually comes short. 
So many things can go wrong.

Whenever plans go right, we take credit. When plans go wrong, we blame the world or something else. 

In "Thinking, Fast and Slow", Daniel Kahneman discusses the psychological tendency known as the "self-serving bias", where people attribute successes to their own abilities and failures to external circumstances.

As a young man making plans for my life, I had nothing and no one to truly depend on that I could put full faith in. I can only depend on myself, right? 

That's fundamentally an insanely scary thing.

How can anyone not be anxious eventually?

How can anyone possibly have pure bliss and peace if they lived with this assumption?

This is what happens when we chase and force outcomes without The Rock being at the center of it all.

It's what happens when we don't lean on the Cornerstone to guide and build our lives around.

We need God.

God made us.

He loved us before He laid the foundations of the universe.

So how can we possibly think we can find identity and purpose that outdoes our Creator's identity and purpose defined for us?

It's just logical thinking.

But we don’t just have blind faith in God.

We don’t believe in God because we’re weak, as most critics will say, we follow despite it being the much harder path, because of what we saw: evidence of God seen with spiritual and physical eyes.

Can anyone look me in the face today, stand beside me, and say I believe in God because I'm weak? Come on.

There is a reason why God called me to a standard higher than most Christian men. It's not easy. No one will see my pain.

Although I am truly weak. But not in the sense that the world defines it.

I rejoice knowing that God's Power is perfected in my weakness.

== 4) Yesterday morning, I had a God and demon talk with my friend ==

Yesterday I met up with a friend, and we never talked about God before. We worked a lot together in the past. He tells me that he believes a terrible health problem happening in his life is probably a sign from God.
I knew it was because I saw the demon on him weeks ago, but I didn’t say anything about it being a demon since we don’t discuss anything spiritual or faith-based. I've been warning him for weeks using practical examples, and he didn't do anything until he ended up in the ER. SMH.

He tells me that many years ago, someone he worked with just entered a special mode all of a sudden during lunch, and spoke to him about my friend's life purpose from God. As he sat there listening, tears rolled down his face because he had never felt so understood. After lunch, that guy warps back to regular mode. The funny thing is, they never talked about it, and none of them said anything about each other's faith or Christianity. They just moved on like nothing happened. LOL.

Anyway, I immediately knew what happened because I do the same.

At work, the Spirit makes me act in normal mode to blend in.

The Spirit works in mysterious ways.

Now, here's the insane part. I did not tell my friend about my demonic encounters in detail. I described being unable to move and seeing pure darkness, and feeling the sense of pure evil. I did not tell him about the brain and head feeling like it's being pulled on.

He looks at me like "yeah, that happens to me all the time."

I'm like, "...really...like a medical thing?"

He's like, "nah, since I was a teenager, sometimes Satan would press me on the ground, other times it's like you, pressed on the bed, you can't move, it's pitch black, and it's an evil feeling, and in your mind, it feels like it's trying to bite your head off."

Dude.

He described the same greater demon of lust I fought.

I ask him, "...so, how many times did this happen?"

He's like, "Oh, ever since I was a teenager, so 100 times or more? Maybe...yeah, definitely over 100 times actually."

Dude.

I need to learn.

So he teaches me about how to beat them, especially the lesser demons, the small ghoul things.

So today, as of 8/2/2025, I faced that small ghoul thing for the first time.

It looked exactly like a goblin. It didn’t look like a ghoul or how I imagined these to look based on my friend’s description.

It was pulling my legs upwards and to the left side as I was sleeping on my stomach.

It was making an evil shriek kind of sound while it stood far in the distance, hiding behind something. It was scared of me.

It was not like the greater demon of lust. That thing was insane. It was definitely trying to devour me and was not afraid of me. Good thing I called on God for that one.

When I saw this lesser demon, I knew it was a slave, a tiny pawn. It was probably forced to come to me even though it knew I would overpower it easily. It fled immediately when I rebuked it, and it made that shrieking sound as it ran back to the abyss. What a loser.

We know from the Bible that people chosen to be God’s warriors are attacked the most by demons because Satan saw. He saw when God was trying to awaken them. Now my friend and I are trying to figure out what God wants him to do.

My spirit senses and my physical eyes see incredible compressions of God's plans. I've documented it all as timestamped screenshots. But I'm not sure what to do with them or when to show who. I pray and I rely on God to lead. I'm also pairing with a Godly pastor who has the gift of discernment. I'm also looking for what I assume to be a Watchmen society somewhere out there, or at least just one more awakened Watchman, just to compare notes and cross-reference before we reveal everything we see, our translation of Revelations for today’s era. We likely won’t understand everything (unless the end days are around the corner), but there’s already Wisdom from another Source beyond human intelligence, revealing many aspects. Not sure, but I sense this is likely part of God's final calling for me on earth.

What I do know is that the time is drawing near due to AI, and I sense many of the chosen just awakened, or are about to awaken, like I did in July 2025.

Peace be with you, my friend.